Friday, February 15, 2013

E is for Emergency

Morning in the Joseph pack went like this:

8:45am Gabe wakes up groggy to take the ever-pacing Belle outside

9:10am Belle wakes me up by vomiting on the floor in the bedroom. I wake up groggy with a call to Gabe that starts with, "Honey, your dog..."

9:12am Gabe identifies the massive wet wad about the size of my hand to be "a knitted object."

9:13am I identify the knitted object as a scarf my sister knit for me years ago that I tied around my Hospital Bear's neck.

9:15am Hospital Bear is brought into the room and confirms, by way of severed scarf, the spilled contents of Belle's belly.

9:16am - 10:30am Gabe cleans the vomit. He goes to work. I take Homer outside while Belle snoozes on the couch.

10:30am The dogs are fed (if you've never witnessed this production, picture a line of pills reminiscent of an alchemist's mixing table, elaborate fabric knots, dog tricks, and other flourishes).

10:35am Belle refuses to eat her food for the second day running and instead runs into the foyer where I hear her being sick. I run to the foyer only to find Belle's mouth around my red jacket. She's chewing it like she chewed the scarf, hoping that the consumption of it will soothe her belly.

10:36am We squabble over the validity of her batty ideas.

10:37am She admits defeat and slinks back into the living room. I follow.

10:38am I realize Belle's medicine-laced food, an entire cup of dry and a fifth a can if wet and enough drugs to down a small dog, is gone.

10:39am Homer comes out of his kennel licking his chomps, round as a hippopotamus.

10:40am I call the vet and am directed to an emergency clinic.

11:00am We arrive at the clinic. They sweep Homer to the back room and induce vomiting while I wait.

Just now: I realize I haven't had breakfast. Homer is returned to me. He's doing fine.

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